Yes, Time Flies

In just under a week my baby will be turning one year old. As the date is coming closer and closer, I’m finding myself in a state of reflection. Every night before I turn out the light to sleep, I stare at pictures of her from one, two, three months old… slowly scrolling until I’m looking at her how she is today. How tiny she looks compared to the little person who now walks all over the house! I used to just sit with her in my arms for hours; there was nothing else she needed. Perfectly content, I would sing her songs, nurse her, burp her and she would fall right back asleep. Her world was my chest and my arms. The distance she could see was from my bosom to my face; she was content.

Now she is only occasionally in a cuddling mood, letting me hold her long enough to feed her milk. She then slides off to go pull all her toys from the bin and to open the drawers and cabinets in the kitchen.  She’s babbling, eating all the food, drinking three times the amount of formula she used to, she’s crawling and climbing up stairs and walking further each new day. She grows to look more like her dad every day, and I’m putting my hope in the fact that maybe our next one will be my mini-me! Her due date was April 6, but she didn’t make an appearance until April 14th. This time last year I was waddling around attempting to not flare up the terrible sciatic nerve pain brought on by my huge belly. A year ago my husband and I were dreaming about who we would meet: a boy or a girl? Benjamin (as was our boy name) or Adeline?

Despite my attempts, I know that I did not capture every possible moment of learning, or cuteness overload- such as the funny little smile she gave me after the first time I brushed her teeth. The minty flavor was weird, but her reaction to it was unbelievably sweet. While it’s such an amazing thing to watch her little brain grow and develop, I can’t help but be a little melancholy that the time has gone, and continues to go by so fast. My little eight pound five ounce baby is becoming so quickly a curious, exploring toddler.

I was warned about so much pertaining to motherhood: you’ll not sleep for months, you’ll watch them sleep, time goes by so fast, you’ll get used to how messy they get, there’s so much poop/pee/spit up...etc. Yes, all those things are true, but I never predicted how much I would miss and love the whole process. There were days that I would cry from lack of sleep, or frustration, or just simply feeling like I had no answers; but those were the days and nights she needed me most. Although she is still very small, and no doubt still needs me in every way, she is changing and evolving so quickly.
My mom joked that, just like she’s watched me, I’ll watch Adeline grow up and get married and have her own baby in the next 20 years. I told her that I could hardly imagine that, but truthfully it’s all to easy to imagine. If this first year has already come and gone… Lord willing the next 19 will go by a little slower, if only to be able to watch my baby grow up.